Pages

Thursday, February 2, 2012

I'm Going to Regret This.

Oh, hi.  Guess what?  I'm on a lot of cold medicine right now.  My head might explode in gush of snot anyway, which should make the guy who comes in to clean the office happy; wiping snot off my computer screen and keyboard.

Dear Guy Who Comes in the Clean the Office:
I'm sorry about the snot-mess.  You're going to deserve a raise for this.
Love, Dana the Biped.

I miss college.  In college, I could go to the nurse anytime I wanted.  We called her Codeine Carrol, because no matter what ailed you, codeine was her answer.  It was awesome.

Anyway, today I planned to write about my face.  There is something wrong with it.  Not just today because it's all puffy and my nose is chapped and my right eye has a tick because the sinus pressure is setting off some muscle contractions in my eyelid.  I mean, there's something wrong with my face all the time.

My face is a total drama queen.  Everything I feel, it shows, but times twenty-four thousand.  A few examples:

This last summer, I was hanging out with The Squeeze.  We'd just been out for lunch, and instead of mints, we got Dum-Dum suckers.  I got cherry, which is definitely the best Dum-Dum flavor.  Root beer is gross, so The Squeeze got that one.  Anyway, we were walking home, and I dropped my Dum-Dum.

How I felt:  Aw, bummer.
How I looked:



The Squeeze bought me a whole bag of Dum-Dums.

Or, how about the time I won tickets to a special screening of Grimm before it aired on TV?

How I felt:  Neato!
How I looked:



And that time I was watching Doctor Who, and Rose had just gotten herself stuck in a different dimension and now he was travelling with Donna, and Rose was in the crowd behind Donna, but then she disappeared?

How I felt:  "What?"
How I looked:


Lord only knows what I would look like if something really, really excited happened to me, like if I won the lottery or something.  Probably like this:



Except I'd be better-dressed.

(True:  My office is really casual.  When I was hired and asked about the dress code, the HR guy said as long as I was wearing clothes, I was good.  But I have to dress a lot more professionally than everyone else, or people think I'm twelve.)



Mya looks really laid back, but she would be super-excited to find a new home.

4 comments:

  1. What a great post Dana! Love the photographic depiction of your face ;)! And I think when I saw that episode of Doctor Who my own face was more like the first one. :(

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sigh. I miss Rose. Oh, the other companions are great, but nobody compares to Rose. Billie Piper and David Tennant need to make about a thousand movies together, and then I might finally get over it.

      Delete
  2. The first face (times 10) is what I looked like at the end of season four. Donna is my Doctor.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do have a serious soft spot for Doctor Donna, but Ten is my guy. My feelings for the duplicate are complicated.

      Delete