Tuesday, July 24, 2012

A Whole New Meaning to the Phrase "Double-Tap"

I did a rare thing this weekend--I took some vacation time.  My folks own property up in the northwoods of Wisconsin, a few of the most beautiful acres in the world, as far as I'm concerned.  Long weekends there mostly involve hanging out outside in one way or another.  We hit a couple of outdoor, dog-friendly art fairs, we took a short hike around Bond Falls (a dog-friendly path), and we went swimming on a dog-friendly beach.

I was particularly looking forward to the latter as this past winter, I'd purchased a life jacket for Prada but hadn't had the opportunity to give it a go yet.  Because Prada is usually uncomfortable in new environments, especially ones where she doesn't feel like she has her feet securely under her, I really didn't know what to expect of the excursion.  I needn't have worried.  Prada paddled her feet for a moment (she's got the instinct for swimming certainly), and then chilled out.  I mean, she relaxed so deeply she almost fell asleep.  I was pretty tickled to say the least.

We didn't stay long.  Even though the water was bathwater warm, it doesn't take much for little dogs to get chilled, and after about fifteen minutes, Prada started shivering and it was time to get out.  But hey, they were a very successful fifteen minutes--it may be time to look up one of the dog-friendly beaches in Chicago I keep hearing about.

Without the dogs, we went four-wheeling (sorry, it's a drought, I can't honestly say we went muddin'), and did some target practice.  My dad has this gorgeous 9mm pistol, a Colt MK IV Series 80, and I had the pleasure of emptying the better part of a clip at the tail end of the weekend.  I'm much more familiar with rifles (though I don't get much practice with those, either, but enough to know I prefer a little bolt-action rifle without too much kick), and after a brief run-down on the mechanics of it, I let loose. 

Our target wasn't exactly high-tech--just a hunter orange circle about four inches in diameter slapped on a pizza sheet, but it did the trick.  Or rather, it probably would have done if I could aim worth a damn.  I hit the tin maybe twice, but not the orange at all.  I'd never be able to hit a zombie in the chest, much less in the head.  I tended to hit a few inches below and to the left of the target--at least I'm consistent.

And now you'll know how to find me in the zombie apocolypse:  I'll be the one being run down by zombies missing their right testicle.

Via


(True:  I never quite understood why it is zombies need to be shot in the head.  Wouldn't fire work, too?  A flame-thrower probably wouldn't require such precise aim.  Just sayin'.)

10 comments:

  1. I think the flame-thrower would totally work and your aim sounds good enough for that.

    Also, maybe it'll be a traditional Haitian zombie instead of a George Romero zombie. If it is, you just need to wait for it to sleep (which apparently Haitian zombies do) and pour rock salt in its mouth. The tricky part there is having to sew their mouths shut afterward.

    On second thought - maybe just go for the flamethrower, no matter what kind of zombie you encounter.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rock salt? Zombies don't need iodine, I guess. But yeah. I'm seriously going to have to mod a Nerf into a flamethrower.

      Delete
  2. You can hide behind me Dana. I'm not a marksman but I think I can hit a zombie in the head. :D

    But why don't you bring the flamethrower along just in case?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okey dokey artichokey. I'll try really hard not to set you on fire.

      Delete
  3. Weird. I posted a reply earlier this morning and it showed up but now it's gone. Cue the outer limits music!

    I said you could hide behind me, that I could probably hit a zombie in the head. But bring the flamethrower just in case! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, for whatever reason, your comments always go to Spam, and I don't know why. It's weird.

      Delete
  4. I'm a dead ringer with that pistol, so just come find me. :). Hubby's no use...couldn't hit the broad side of a barn... :). Love, your zombie-ass-kicking sister

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol, city boy. Dad was pretty consistently hitting low and to the left as well, so I'm blaming the sight. :) (PS, let's be honest: you'd kick anyone's ass.)

      Delete
  5. I'm so glad you stopped by! I can't believe that post from almost two years ago is still so popular. Come by anytime

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, that's what you get for writing a great post!

      Delete