But it was a belt with a pocket in it that had just enough room for your ID and maybe one key. And it was flat! Flat does not equal fanny pack, okay??? I just didn't want to deal with a purse at a theme park, and the belt was totally hidden beneath my t-shirt. So just stop maligning my dignity right there. I am unquestionably dignified at all times.
Needless to say, I took a lot of flak for it. But then I discovered these:
(True: Last weekend I saw a dude unashamedly rocking a fanny pack. But he also was wearing short shorts and work boots with the shoelaces artistically untied, so I don't know if that's a sign the fanny pack is making a comeback or if he was just a hipster prepared for the zombie apocalypse.)