I was a bit nervous about what my family might say to him. My extended family--the older generation, anyway--is of the opinion that women should marry young. I graduated from college magna cum laude, but without my MRS degree, so no good.
My Sister the Lawyer got married some years ago--four, or something. I don't remember. At her bridal showers, the Great-Aunt Evelyns (there are at least three of them) cornered me for an intervention. They were concerned. You see, I was already twenty-three, and if I didn't get married and have babies soon, my parts might shrivel up and fall out.
Anway, because of this, I was a bit nervous. Other than my grandma holding onto The Squeeze's hand as if she were asking him to save me from drowning in the Titanic, it went swimmingly. (Sorry, I like puns. I am very ashamed.)
Of course, ever since The Incident of the Evelyns, I've been prepared:
"Oh, I'm waiting for either Johnny Depp or the Mother Ship--whichever comes last."
(True: Patrick Stewart would be a more-than-acceptable alternate. I once saw him play Antony in Antony and Cleopatra, and he sweated on me. It was awesome.)
|I would totally save your kids from the Titanic. Especially if there were kibble in their pockets. I'm totally a family man. I probably deserve a treat just for saying that.|