For example, the time I was sitting by a bar buddy and her friend, who I'd never met before. New Face seemed like a nice enough lady, and we chatted casually for a while. It seemed natural enough to offer her a mint when I opened the tin to grab one myself.
New Face took a long, hard look at the tin and finally said, "No thanks, I'm a Christian." And then she got up to grab another beer, finding another seat when she'd been served.
Later, by the light of a lone, black, chicken blood-scented candle, I spun a maraschino cherry on the lid of my Mystifying Mints, and the stem pointed to "Good Bye," and I realized what a terrible person I am. But at least I'm a terrible person with devilishly fresh breath.
(True: The pointer thingy that comes with a Ouija board is called a "planchette." I know this because I read trashy romance novels.)